Kirk's Top 5 Horror Movie Franchises

 Greetings and salutations, 

    It's Kirk coming to you from the Hospital Bed of Love, and I've got the spooky, spine-chilling, Top 5 for this haunted month of October. Ah, the fall, how I love thee. When I wasn't disabled, I used to put up the Halloween decorations on September 1st, and they would remain until November 1st. Some of the decorations were allowed to stay up, as they could be construed as Thanksgiving-related, too, but those were the start and stop dates for those decorations. And yes, I have walked into the Hallween sections looking for new home decor with that sole purpose in mind. It was the only time that my wife would allow me to have a normal-looking house. So, without any further ado... on with the show!

The Top 5 Horror Movie Franchises:

5) Subspecies: I LOVE Radu as a vampire. He is so EVIL! This movie series, the first one in general, is a staple for when I watch a baby for the first night. It started with my sister, then my youngest brother, then a little girl I was caring for, then my nephew, and finally my children. The first two times were just a matter of luck, but then I made it a tradition. The sinisterly wicked Radu is one of my top-tier vampires of all time. The son of the vampire king and a witch, he is genuinely not to be reconed with. 

4) Halloween (The Non-Rob Zombie/New Jamie Lee Curtis ones) I love the originals, 4, 5, and 6 have a special place in my heart. I loved the Jaime Lloyd saga, although I didn't like that six couldn't have Danielle Harris return to reprise her role. Funny thing is, she's the same age as my wife, and her name is Jaime too. So, why not the Rob Zombies? Well, the first one would have been okay; I liked the backstory of Michael, but... a stripper mom and an abusive stepdad? A bit much. But it does have a topless Danielle Harris, so it's a win for me. The second one was beyond stupid. Sorry, if you like it, you want it. Those who don't, you feel me. As for the New JLCs, they're just a cash grab at the nostalgia. The fact that they ignore not only the Jamie Lloyd saga, BUT also H20! They killed off two of Laurie's kids because of lazy writing. Doing it once might be overlookable, but doing it twice is unacceptable!

3) Friday the 13th: Am I one of the few who got Scream's question about the killer in the original Friday the 13th right when they asked it? As good as the first one was, the sequels kept up the pace of the modern-day slasher. While Siskel and Ebert might not have liked them, I loved them. Part VI, Jason Lives, is my favorite. I was lucky enough to see it at a drive-in when I was growing up. Although my childhood was not ideal, the drive-in dates we had with the Howards were always enjoyable.

2) A Nightmare on Elm Street: Oh, I love this series! It's one of my all-time favorites. But then you're asking what's number one. Just wait, you'll know soon enough. But how can you not love the sarcastically driven, finger-knife-wearing bastard son of a thousand maniacs? As a teenager, I couldn't get enough of Freddy. I worked by butt off doing chores, which was more than what the book was worth, but I got the Nightmares on Elm Street book, which told the stories of the first three films. Sadly, my brother chopped it up, and my mother did nothing about it. I purchased it later, but unfortunately, it was lost when I lost the items we had stored. The only reason we lost it was due to my disability from work ending. That left me without a check, and, consequently, we lost our storage shed.

1) The Universal Monsters: After that sad ending to number two, I'm lifting it with the grand daddy of them all, the Universal Monsters. Starting with Bela Lugosi's Dracula to Boris Karloff's work in three of them (Frankenstein, The Mummy, and Bride of Frankenstein), you can't get much better than the classics. Yes, they're not as scary as they used to be. Please turn on the nightly news, they're a staple for any horror movie fan. And don't give me that grief that they're black and white. Grow a spine and watch them. They should be respected and honored, as they are the beginning of a unique art form that none compares to.